Stolen and Forgiven Read online

  Holden stood in the doorway so Ariel couldn’t walk past him. He needed to make sure she understood some of what was happening before she faced the fray.

  “Today is the day of the branding,” Holden said softly.

  Ariel frowned and looked down at her own brand. “What does that mean?”

  He closed his eyes for a moment before speaking. “It means today is the day I am forced to follow through with the SAU’s sanctions. They require all shifters, ages two and above, to wear the brand of their species.”

  Ariel’s eyes widened and her face paled. “Two?” she whispered.

  He fisted his hands at his side. “Two. I was the one who branded you, and I will be the one to brand them, as well.”

  Ariel swayed on her feet, and he reached out and gripped her arms. “They force you to brand babies?”

  He growled softly. “Yes. I know I’ve mentioned something to that effect before, but I didn’t go into detail. The SAU forces me to brand every child in our Pack. I have been doing it since I was fifteen and became the Alpha.”

  Ariel looked up at him, and he expected to see revulsion, instead, the pity he saw there made him frown.

  “Oh, Holden, I’m so sorry. I can’t believe they make you do that. Those fucking bastards. They are killing you each time they force you do to that.”

  He leaned back. “You don’t think I’m a monster?”

  She shook her head and put her hand on his chest. “No, of course, not. I think those who put you in this position are. They are the same ones that gave me nightmares and made me scream. I will never blame you for what they make you do. But I have to ask, how do the babies fare? I mean, I know they heal quickly, but Holden, that’s horrible.”

  He cupped her face and looked down at her, his jaw set. “What I am about to tell you must not leave this room. The Pack knows because they have faced it before, but like our secrets of the change, this is another.”

  “Of course, Holden. I would never hurt you or the Pack. You saved me. Took me in, even if it was against your best interest.”

  He relaxed marginally even though he wasn’t a hundred percent sure she truly felt that way. The Pack hadn’t embraced her like they might have in the past before the Verona virus had hit. But that was a discussion for another time—one they would be having.

  “As Alpha, I can take the pain from them in this. I can’t do it often, and keep my reserves for the branding.”

  Ariel’s eyes widened and tears formed in her eyes. “Oh, Holden. You take the pain from each child.”

  “Of course,” he said simply. “Every month, we tell the children they must scream and lash out as if they are in pain while I take the agony into myself. I can feel each burn, each stroke, but I can’t show it. Some slips through and the humans believe it’s because I hate what I am doing. It only eggs them on to keep at it. They want us to treat ourselves as monsters so they can continue to do the same.”

  “Holden,” she whispered. “There are hundreds of Pack members inside these walls.”

  “I know.”

  A single tear fell down her cheek, and he brushed it away. “Don’t cry for me, siren.”

  “I will if I want to. You’re in pain because you are protecting your Pack like a good Alpha should do. And the children have to scream and pretend it hurts. I hate all of it.”

  “The children will feel it heal, I can’t stop that, so they will have some pain later, but it’s mostly itchy at that point. They wear their collars and keep their secrets. Even the babies know not to share with the humans who cage them.” He frowned. “If we had an Omega, things might be different. The role as healer, for both the physical and emotional needs of the Pack, can take away that pain and diffuse it while all I can do is take it all in. But we don’t have one, so I make do.”

  Ariel shook her head. “And if you can’t meet other Packs to mate in, you might not find an Omega until the next generation.”

  “If at all,” he said softly.

  “I will need you by my side for this as my mate, Ariel. I know we aren’t surefooted yet, but we need to stand tall for the parents who have to watch their children come into a fold we never should be in to begin with. We keep having children, because if we don’t, the humans win, but it’s a harsh reality out there. The guards will once again be there, but there is still a good chance you can remain hidden as you are.”

  She shook her head, her shoulders deflating. “We’ll never be truly safe with me inside the den walls.”

  “We never were before, Ariel. I brought you in, and I’ll be damned if I’ll let them take you.” He hadn’t meant to be that honest, but she’d left him bare with her words about the branding. He’d underestimated her, and he needed remember not to do that again.

  Ariel froze for a moment then frowned. “Wait. If you could do that, then why did I feel the brand marking my skin?” She held up a hand. “Not that I want you to feel that pain for me. You do enough already, and I don’t want you in pain for me, but I don’t understand why you didn’t. Does that make sense?”

  He let out a breath. “You’re my mate, siren. We might not have the ink on our skin, but my wolf is yours. We’re too connected for the Pack magic to work. I had trouble with my control over that power when I first started and children of friends of mine are even harder to keep a rein on the pain.” His chest felt hollow, and he let out a shaky breath. “That’s why people tend to stay away from me if they plan on having children. The closer I am to them, the harder it is to keep my connection in a way that allows me to keep their pain and not have it go back to them. If we have a bond in any way, it almost makes my powers null.”

  Ariel put her hand on his chest once again and lifted on her toes to kiss the bottom of his chin. “Never take my pain, Holden. If you want me to be a partner, then let me help. I won’t leave your side today. I’ll help you in any way I can. If that means holding you while you grieve the part of you the humans ripped away, then I will. I know this isn’t what we thought it was, but I’m yours, Holden. All I ask is that you let me find my place.”

  His wolf pressed against him, wanting out, wanting to run and be with Ariel until the end of days rather than being merely the Alpha. Yet, he couldn’t do that. Instead, he brought Ariel in his arms, inhaled her scent, and knew they’d find a way to make this work.

  He pulled away and rested his forehead on hers. “We need to go. If we’re late, the humans will take it out on us.”

  “The SAU,” she whispered. “Call them the SAU. Not all humans would do this.” Tears glazed over her eyes, even if he saw the fury in them. “But I still hate that I fell for the lies the SAU told us. I hate myself for not finding a way to free you. I’ll never forgive myself.”

  He kissed her softly and led her away from the house. “Propaganda works wonders, siren. We’ll find a way to our freedom.” They had to. She slid her hand into his, and his wolf brushed up against his skin, wanting more. The wolf had already fallen for the woman—had at first scent—now the man knew her strength, her determination and wasn’t far behind.

  “So the guards just watch?” Ariel asked, her voice low.

  Holden growled and took a deep breath. He needed to remain in full control today. If he didn’t, he’d slip up and the children would feel the pain. There was no way he could take that chance. He owed it to his Pack to protect them—even from himself.

  “Yes, they watch. They also take out some of our wolves and make examples of them if we’re not showing the proper respect.” He clenched his jaw and allowed his wolf to once again rise to the surface. His wolf would aid in what they had to do as long as Holden held the reins.

  “Examples?”

  “They use Tasers and electric sticks to hurt us when we’re not doing what they want.”

  “Barbarians.”

  “And yet we’re the ones with the collars.” He looked down at her, only to see her fingering the collar at her neck. If there had been another way to keep her safe without forcing her to end
ure captivity he’d have done it.

  There might have been another choice…one that only a chosen few knew about, but Ariel wouldn’t have survived outside the walls in that circumstance. He pushed that unnecessary thought from his mind.

  They made their way to the center of the compound, Ariel’s hand firmly clasped in his. A few wolves had already gathered there, waiting for Holden to begin. Not every wolf would show up for this. There was only so much everyone could stomach year after year. At first, every single Pack member had shown up as a sign of solidarity, but Holden had pushed them away after a few years. Forcing everyone to witness the brutality that came with captivity and being Alpha only hurt the morale of the Pack. So only a chosen few would stay behind and guard Holden when he was at his weakest. Friends and family members of the children who had just turned two would also be in attendance. No children other than the ones who would be branded today were there.

  They didn’t need to see this as they’d already lived it once. When they were adults, they would be able to come back and help Holden and those who would forever be changed. Of course, if Holden and the others had their way, by the time the children were old enough to choose, they wouldn’t be behind the walls anymore, under the thumb of the SAU.

  Time would tell if plans came to fruition.

  Once again, he pushed those thoughts from his mind. He rolled his shoulders and let go of Ariel’s hand. She brushed his hip, and he looked down at her.

  “Let me hold you,” she said softly.

  He shook his head. “I need to concentrate,” he whispered, knowing the guards were near.

  She lifted up on her toes and brushed a kiss on his cheek. “Then I will be here when you need me.”

  He nodded, emotion clogging his throat. He shouldn’t have brought her here, not when he wanted to keep her as his, but he hadn’t had a choice. The Pack needed to see her, and Ariel needed to know everything about what it meant to be the Alpha’s mate.

  In his mind, once she shifted, she would be a partner, one who could stand with him and help him keep his Pack safe. She would be strong, fearless, and soft only for him. Though she hadn’t shown her true wolf yet, he could taste the dominance of her soul, the strength of her heart.

  She would be an Alpha’s mate in truth. Of that he was sure.

  There were six children today.

  So many.

  Of course, they hadn’t had a branding in four months. The guards hadn’t come to force it and Holden had held off, knowing the SAU wanted its hands in all things shifter. He’d branded more than six at one time before, but today would be long. He met Soren’s gaze, and his Beta nodded. Holden would be out of energy at the end of this. It would take all in his power to keep on his feet and make it home, before he passed out in agony and sheer exhaustion. Soren would have to do his best to keep the peace and the Pack safe while Holden was out of commission.

  His wolf huffed at the thought, but Holden held back a shrug. This was his lot in life, and he’d do it over and over again if it meant the relative safety of his people.

  The children had wide eyes and pale faces. Three boys and three girls, all so tiny that Holden wasn’t sure they even looked two years of age. Soon they would be able to shift into their wolf form, little adorable pups who would one day be the large wolves humans feared.

  “Are you ready?” he asked softly, trying to keep his face emotionless. If he looked like he cared, the humans would know. Oh, the guards might not be in sight, but he could scent them. They were watching, waiting to see what Holden would do.

  Each child nodded, their little hands in their parents'. They children would know their role. They would scream and hold their breath so their face would turn red. If they could, they would cry. A few children faked passing out so they wouldn’t have to scream. At two years old, these pups had to endure the worst in humanity but only had to act in true pain. It was sad how good they were becoming at this.

  Soren walked to his side, six collars on his arm and the branding iron in his other fist. As Beta, Soren would place the collars around the children’s necks before each branding—much like he had done with Ariel.

  Holden let out a breath, aware the guards had shown themselves, slowly surrounding the small group of people who had come to lend support. Every once in a while, Holden could forget they were in a cage and think worry about inter-Pack issues and dominance fights. Then things like this happened, and he got shoved to the front of their existence.

  “We don’t have all day, Alpha,” the younger guard spat. Holden and Soren recognized him as one of those who had come looking for Ariel. “Brand the little monsters and we’ll leave. I’m not in the mood to deal with your stench for longer than I have to.”

  “Jesus, let this kid breathe first,” Theo mumbled on Holden’s other side. The younger wolf’s eyes widened and Holden cursed.

  “What was that, bastard?” The guard flicked a switch on the electric wand and let out a weak human growl. “Did you just talk back to me?”

  Holden snarled and put himself in front of Theo. The younger man might be a full grown adult, but he was still a pup in transition in some respects. He couldn’t control his temper all the time, and that was a liability.

  “Let’s get on with the branding,” Holden bit out.

  The guard tilted his head up and glared. “Get out of my fucking way, or I’ll tase all of you. Get me, Alpha?”

  Theo stepped out from behind Holden, his head held high. “Come at me.” Holden could hear the regret laced in Theo’s tone, but did his best not to react to it. Theo would pay for his outburst.

  Holden fisted his hands at his side, forced to do nothing as his Pack repeatedly bled for who they were. There was nothing he could do without harming the ones who couldn’t take care of themselves. One day that would change, he had to believe their plans would work. But for now, he was powerless.

  Theo stood tall as the guard slammed the edge of the stick into his side. The wolf let out a pained whimper, but only those with enhanced hearing would have been able to pick up on it.

  Holden let the guard hit Theo two more times before he’d had enough. Frankly, he’d had enough years ago.

  “Enough! If you want to get through the branding today, then you will let us get to it. If not, we can do it another time.”

  The guard spit on the ground near a still standing Theo. “Want the other end of my stick, too?”

  Theo snorted. “Sounds like you want dick, asshole. Not sure why you’re hiding it. Nothing wrong with that. But if that’s the case, don’t take your frustrations out on us.”

  Holden closed his eyes even as he felt Ariel’s hand on his back. “Theo.”

  The younger wolf lowered his gaze then moved so he stood behind Ariel, flanking her just in case.

  “That little bastard is going to get what’s coming to him.”

  Holden raised his chin. “Remember, human, you can beat us with full force, but you are one tiny man with only a few other tiny men behind you. Keep taunting us, and I might lose my temper.” He let his wolf rise to the surface. “Try me.”

  The guard gulped then gestured toward Holden’s hand. “Get on with the branding.”

  Ariel snarled behind him and Holden froze for a fraction of a second. Fuck, her wolf had to be close to the surface, as well. Soon she’d have to shift. The hunt was that night so she didn’t have long to wait. But fuck, this was bad timing.

  “Sorry,” she whispered, so low that only he could hear it.

  He reached around with his free hand and squeezed her arm, letting her know it was okay. In most cases, becoming wolf was natural, a way to show emotion. Right then though, they had to be careful, and Theo had already tread far too close to the line.

  Holden pulled her to the side so he faced the children. When he held up the branding iron, two of the children paled while the others widened their eyes. They might have been told this wasn’t going to hurt them, but they were babies, they might not believe it.

&
nbsp; One day, for every brand he’d been forced to make, he would take it out of the skin of those who had captured them. His people were branded, but not forgotten.

  Ariel put her hands on his back. “I’m here for you.”

  He took in her strength, knowing he would need it. “Come.”

  The first one, a little boy with dark hair and trembling parents came forward. He held out his arm, his head held high. One day this little boy would be a dominant wolf, strong and powerful. For now, he needed to keep the innocence the humans would deny him.

  Soren took the branding iron from him and stuck into the fire. The metal, a special amalgam that heated quickly, burned red hot. Holden reached for the handle, bracing himself for the pain that would come soon.

  He met the little boy’s eyes and gave a slight nod. The child let out a breath and screamed as soon as Holden pressed the hot iron to his skin. Only Holden knew from the look in the kid’s eyes it was all an act on his part. The little boy didn’t feel a thing—thank God.

  Red hot flame scorched through Holden—burning through his soul. Agony swept through him, his brow starting to sweat. He was used to this, but something was off. He wasn’t feeling as much as he should have. He looked at the kid again, but didn’t see an ounce of real pain on his face, nor did he scent pain coming from him.

  No, the pain he scented was from himself…and from the woman holding his back.

  “Fuck,” he cursed. The guards snickered beside him but he didn’t pay them any mind.

  “Keep going,” Ariel whispered, pain laced through her tone.

  They might not share a physical bond like so many humans thought they would, but they still had a sense of belonging, a connection like no other. Because she was his mate, the mate of an Alpha, she could take some of his pain, some of the child’s pain away.

  It wasn’t supposed to be like this.

  “No,” he grunted as he pulled the iron away. “Go home,” he grunted. He’d been thinking she’d see him as a monster for what he had to do, but now it was different. Now he was hurting her. Again.